Changing My Name - Need Someone To Talk To About It
Posted 30 August 2018 - 06:09 AM
I may have an unusual question/need for help. Since I was 17, when my father died, I have been thinkin about changing my surname, so I wouldn't have his. He was an egoistic, violent genius, made our lives hell. all those years both me and my mom have nightmares about my father, feelings like he is still here... Now I'm 34 and mother is 70, she decided that she definitely doesn't want to die with his name and wants to take back her maiden name. Since her parents were absolutely lovely people, I loved them and my few happy memories from childhood are always connected with them, I decided to take the name too. But I still hesitate, is it worth it? I need someone else's opinion... I don't have anyone to talk to about this, am almost sure I'll never get married, so I'll be stuck with my surname for eternity, probably.
I'm diagnosed with depression/anxiety, so aside from the byrocratic process of changing my name, I'm scared of curious questions about the change, announcing it at work...
What do you guys think about this? Can the change, in your opinion, help me disconnect from my past a bit? Is it worth it?
I know I'm the one to make this decision, but I could really use someone else's counsel.
Posted 30 August 2018 - 06:37 AM
I am sorry; sometimes I think people don't deserve to raise their children! But, you were lucky to have your mother and her parents.
People change their names for whatever reasons and it isn't that strange or hard to do here in Australia. The only thing I can suggest if you do change your surname is to rehearse what you want to tell people so you feel comfortable if anyone asks. I think a reasonable response "My father wasn't a nice person and I no longer want his surname", is quite acceptable!
Posted 30 August 2018 - 06:41 AM
Posted 30 August 2018 - 09:52 PM
Posted 31 August 2018 - 03:50 AM
Life is short, enjoy it!
Posted 31 August 2018 - 03:57 AM
Posted 31 August 2018 - 05:28 PM