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The Jokers Corner


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#1 Captain Kundalini

 

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Posted 11 June 2012 - 02:44 AM

What do Vegetarian Zombies crave?

Grraaaaaaiiiiiiinnnnnns!

#2 the_gray_jester

 

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Posted 12 June 2012 - 12:24 PM

I claim this section as the Jesters corner. :P

Hmm,  i have lots of jokes, but most cant be used on a public board.

A Duck was crossing a road,  as he got to the curb a chicken came running to him screaming "don't do it! don't do it! Or you'll never hear the *bleeping* end if it!!!!"
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Posted 12 June 2012 - 02:21 PM

Two peanuts were walking down a rough and tough street. One was a salted :)

#4 Captain Kundalini

 

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Posted 12 June 2012 - 08:02 PM

View PostSilentWalkerGStudy, on 12 June 2012 - 02:21 PM, said:

Two peanuts were walking down a rough and tough street. One was a salted :)


Oh Ack!

#5 fbjewels

 

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Posted 18 June 2012 - 10:00 AM

My twelve year old neighbor told us a funny-in-an-awful-way one the other day:

"I knew a girl named Sarah who was hit by a bus.   Knock Knock."

"Who's there?"

"Not Sarah."

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#6 clinsey

 

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Posted 10 July 2012 - 06:03 PM

My dad told me a funny story the other day.  His friend went to the doctor and since he was pretty over-weight he was put on a diet.  The doctor told him it shouldn't be too bad.  He told him to eat 3 good meals 1 day, and then skip a day, then eat 3 good meals the next day, then skip a day, and so on.

Well, the doctor saw the guy again about 4 weeks later and couldn't believe how much weight he lost!!! He looked like he had lost about 100 pounds already!

He said "Well, it looks like you've lost a lot more weight than I thought you would've by now.  How do you like the diet?"

The guy replied, "Eating 3 good meals a day is great, but I'm exhausted from all the skipping!!!"



#7 the_gray_jester

 

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Posted 20 July 2012 - 09:56 AM

"A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds, ''But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal.''
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#8 Paranormal_RN

 

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Posted 11 November 2012 - 04:08 PM

How do you catch a unique rabbit?------------------------------------u-nigue up on it!

How do you catch a tame rabbit? -------------------------------------the tame way! :happy0194:
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#9 Safire973

 

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Posted 11 November 2012 - 04:47 PM

View PostOlderlady, on 11 November 2012 - 04:08 PM, said:

How do you catch a unique rabbit?------------------------------------u-nigue up on it!

How do you catch a tame rabbit? -------------------------------------the tame way! :happy0194:
Dear God, my Dad used to say that all the time lol
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#10 Paranormal_RN

 

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Posted 13 November 2012 - 11:05 AM

I have a riddle:  You have two coins that total $.55 cents.  One is NOT a nickle, what are the two coins?
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#11 fbjewels

 

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Posted 17 November 2012 - 03:18 AM

The OTHER one is a nickel?

#12 Paranormal_RN

 

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Posted 17 November 2012 - 08:05 AM

You are correct fbjewels!  Do you have one?
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#13 BlueRose3

 

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Posted 17 November 2012 - 09:56 AM

I don't know if fbjewels has a nickel but I have one if you need it. LOL..

#14 Paranormal_RN

 

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Posted 17 November 2012 - 10:12 AM

I meant does anyone else have a riddle?
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#15 blueline

 

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Posted 31 December 2012 - 04:27 PM

What gets wetter the more you dry?

Edited by blueline, 31 December 2012 - 04:27 PM.

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#16 Paranormal_RN

 

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Posted 31 December 2012 - 04:32 PM

A towel?
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#17 blueline

 

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Posted 31 December 2012 - 05:25 PM

You're good. That is correct.

Your turn.
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#18 blueline

 

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Posted 31 December 2012 - 05:42 PM

Alright, one more

What's black & white and red all over?
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#19 Paranormal_RN

 

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Posted 01 January 2013 - 09:02 AM

A newspaper?  A sunburned skunk?
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#20 Paranormal_RN

 

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Posted 01 January 2013 - 09:15 AM

I have one:  Picture a ship at anchor.  Over the side hangs a rope ladder with half meter rungs.  The tide rises a half meter per hour.  At the end of five hours, how much of the ladder will remain above the water assuming that nine rungs were above the water when the tide began to rise?
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